Number 207

 A Group of Morons...

... in eastern Oregon want to secede from Oregon and join Idaho. This is entirely political, as many of the folks who live in the eastern part of the state are Republican, while the majority of Oregon's population, which lives in the western part of the state, tend to be Democrat. The folks in the east want to join Idaho, because they feel as if they (and issues important to them), are being ignored by the Oregon state legislature. By joining Idaho, a reliably Republican state, our friends from eastern Oregon believe they will be better represented by a state legislature more philosophically aligned with their point of view.

Personally, I think this is a genius idea. Our friends in eastern Oregon are on to something. In fact I don't think they go far enough. I think we should redraw the borders to all 50 states. And in order to ensure equal representation we start by dividing the population of the United States by 50 (330,000,000/50), to get an approximate population for each new state somewhere between 6.5 to 7 million folks.

Start at the eastern tip of Maine, the southern tip of Florida or Texas, or even the western tip of the Aleutian Islands of Alaska and carve up the country in chunks that approximate 6.75 million people.

Of course that means that the New York metropolitan area, just by itself, would equal three states. And out in the west, where the buffalo roam, Nebraska, North and South Dakota, Wyoming, Montana, and Idaho (remember Idaho?), would combine to become a single state. Comparatively that would give New York City (alone) six U.S. senators and thirty U.S. representatives, while our new western geographical monstrosity would have two U.S. senators and ten U.S. representatives.

The area that makes up Southern California, with the San Francisco Bay area thrown in for kicks, would alone be divided into five states. For those keeping score that equals ten more senators and fifty more reps. In other words, our friends in eastern Oregon should be careful of what they wish for. If (and hopefully when), our country rids itself of the completely undemocratic electoral college and begins electing  presidents based upon popular vote alone (you know, they way every other election is settled), the results would leave them catatonic. So, yeah, eastern Oregon, thanks for the great idea.