Strength
If I have a romantic image of myself, it's the 'strong and silent, but generous' type. A person of few needs, who needs very little help navigating the world, but is more than willing to pitch in and help another person when they are in need. The reality is slightly different. I do have needs, although I am loathe to mention them, and I'm silent to a fault when I should actually express my needs. I do my best to pitch in and help out, and I believe myself to be generous to others, although I could do a lot better with the time and resources I do have.
Covid-19 and social isolation, for a variety of reasons too mundane to mention, are kicking my ass. The facade I've spent decades working on - a person of dependable strength - is collapsing. It's left me feeling all alone, and distant from the people I love the most. Right at the moment when people of strength, courage, and imagination are stepping forward to help others in need, I have become a shadow of myself. I feel broken and adrift, and so incredibly disappointed in myself.
help.
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